debutante blogger

Pagi ini, saya baru saja rampung membaca sebuah novel bergenre MetroPop keluaran Gramedia, yang saya beli pada jam istirahat makan siang kantor sekitar seminggu sebelumnya.

‘Say No to Love’, merupakan novel paling baru karya Wiwien Wintarto yang dirilis pada bulan September 2007 lalu.

Jujur, tadi pagi, saking serunya ingin menyelesaikan bab-bab akhir novel yang memiliki tebal 309 halaman ini, saya sampai hampir lupa berangkat kantor dan berimbas telat masuk. Untung saja, saya jago ngeles dan bikin alasan, sehingga ngga dimarahi Pak Boss (yang kebetulan hari ini juga datang terlambat) Hehehe… Lagi ‘bejo’ rupanya nasib saya hari ini! J

Kesan pertama membaca novel ini, cukup seru karena dialog serta penggunaan bahasa yang amat luwes oleh penulis, membuat kita mau tidak mau tersapu halaman demi halaman dengan cepat.

Alur cerita juga mengalir cukup baik, walau pada bab-bab awal saya sempat tersentak dengan plot yang langsung dibuat naik grafik emosinya. Meskipun selanjutnya cenderung stabil kembali, tanpa ada usaha untuk kembali mengangkat emosi pembaca, ‘setegang’ beberapa halaman awal yang penggambaran konfliknya cukup dramatis.

Secara singkat, novel ini berceritakan tentang pengalaman seorang gadis muda dalam meniti karir, tapi akhirnya malah menghasilkannya sebuah romansa cinta diantara dirinya dengan sang atasan yang memang masih seusia.

Wuaaaah, seandainya hal ini terjadi pada saya… (Ngarep *mode on*)

Pada dasarnya, saya jatuh cinta pada ide besar yang dipilih penulis untuk mengangkat dunia kerja gadis-gadis rookie yang seolah masih clueless dan optimis sekali menghadapi dunia kerja yang tidak selalu menyenangkan. Mungkin, sebagian besar karena kenyataan bahwa saat ini saya sedang melalui masa yang sama dengan karakter utama yang diberi nama cantik, Dewi Eriandari (dalam cerita kehidupan saya, minus the love story tentu! *damn*)

Hal lainnya yang telah membuat saya jatuh cinta adalah penggambaran penulis akan kota Semarang yang menjadi setting lokasi sebagian besar part cerita… Mendadak saya jadi kepingin balik berkunjung ke Semarang lagi. Sudah agak butek juga melihat kota Jakarta yang makin hari, makin penuh sesak, puanas serta hobby MACET (PARAHHHH).

Penggunaan bahasa Jawa disana-sini seputar dialog juga sempat membuat saya larut dalam gelak tawa tersendiri yang akhirnya malah sukses membuat saya tiba-tiba punya hasrat untuk mempelajari boso Jowo lebih lanjut. Sugeng Ndalu… Sugeng Dahar… hehehe.

Setelah selesai membaca dan sedikit mengkontemplasikannya sampai saat saya menuliskan review ini, saya berkesimpulan bahwa mungkin maksud yang ingin disampaikan penulis dalam karya kali ini adalah bahwa: kenyataannya dalam hidup ini memang ada beberapa hal yang datang secara effortless… Ngga perlu terlalu ‘berusaha banget’ untuk mendapatkannya, karena memang sudah ada dari sononya. Seperti chemistry dua karakter utama Dewi dan Wisnu yang langsung klop… 

Mungkin penulis ingin menggaris-bawahi bahwa justru hal-hal seperti inilah yang harusnya kita perjuangkan. The easier things in life… Bukan malahan punya kegemaran baru ‘memperkeruh’ kehidupan sendiri dengan menciptakan drama-drama tidak penting…

Perkara cinta itu seharusnya sederhana, mudah dan tidak meribetkan para manusia-manusia yang terlibat didalamnya.

Simple…

As simple, as the sky is blue.

I just got off a very hard month indeed, for me, both mentally and physically… A period in which I truly had to bend over backwards just to make it pass from day to day.

In retrospect, as some of you’d probably know that I just resigned from my last workplace by the end of January. I told my superiors that the reason for my leaving is pretty much because I was concerned with my personal health… I do have some issues back then with my health, even though it was a minor one. Both my boss happened to understand the circumstance that I was in… They both were particularly considerate towards my decision in leaving the company.

Both even said that if I was going to move to another workplace which was better for me (career wise) that they were supportive and they even wishes me the best of luck. Well, that wasn’t necessarily the case at that time being… I was really ready to leave the office just to re-charge myself. To better up my health condition first, before I could be all set to perform well again at the workplace that I will be serving.  I also needed a time-out just to sort my head through. I was kind of feeling like I had lost touch from I was doing. Personally, I felt like I was not performing well enough and boy, do I hate that feeling. Thus, with proper judgment and contemplation, my mind was finally made up, ‘I am going to resign.’

I was so glad and thankful that my superiors were okay with my choice and that they even said that if I ever change my mind and will want to get back to their office in the future, they would be happy to welcome me back. For that only, I feel much obliged, forever grateful to them… After all, for about a year time I spent working for them, I truly feel like I had learned so much and develop a lot as a person.

However, just a week after I resigned, I got a call from another company that wanted me to join in their next production. Well, first they asked whether or not I could meet up with the Executive Producer for an appropriate interview. And on a whim, I said yes.

For those of you who haven’t known yet, that since I was in college, I had always been obsessed to join a Production House and/or TV station… Just because I had always wanted to know what it feels like to be a PA (Production Assistant). I’m guessing, that there is nothing wrong in wanting to be something, rite? Rather than wanting to be… nothing. So I went to the interview and got really excited, because the job was something that I had always dreamed of doing in life. To sum up, I finally decide to take the job.

Oh and did I forget to mention that one of my cousin had already join the Production House beforehand? That was where I got my connection to the company, through my cousin. But, not wanting to take any advantage out of this state, I called her just before I took the job… I wanted to clear the situation and to know whether or not she’d be okay with the fact that I will be entering her workplace, her circle of colleagues, well, basically her world. She said that it was not a problem at all from her side. However I had the feeling that I had to affirm the fact that I will be accountable for whatever action that I will take throughout the whole process. I don’t want her to get the feeling like I was riding on her back. But, somehow I feel the fact that one of my cousins has already worked in the company and is doing really well with her job there, makes me even more so determined not to be a disappointment to her as well, somehow.

I did take upon the job one day and begin my journey in my newest workplace with wishful thinking… I figured, I was ready to conquer this job with all my might.

To be honest, I must admit that it was one hell of a tough job, because we were immediately shipped out to different cities in Indonesia to audition the participant that will be joining this particular reality show that the company is producing. This is where all -the bending over backwards- happened… To visualize the situation, we had to be ready 24/7 to work our physics as well as our creativity all out too. It was definitely really tough and hard for me to manage. Even ‘better’, on my first trip I got really ill, but I couldn’t and somehow wouldn’t want to show it… so, I did all I can to cope. I survived on all the medicine and supplements that my body could take. And (not wanting to sound righteous) on prayers of course, cause it never fails…

Envisaging the situation graphically is not easy to do, but best believe when I said that it was a grueling struggle for me to go through. I literally was striving hard.

One month after, just a day following the last audition in Jakarta, my physic crash… My physic had failed me once again… My health and physic condition had always been my problem ever since I could remember. I was always the weakest girl when it comes to physical condition. I never wanted to make a reason out of this state, simply because I hate it.

I firmly hate this fact, because most of the time (if not always) it is what makes me feel like a big fat failure.

God knows, it is exactly how I feel now, just as I had to resign again from my newest workplace after a month worth of struggle.

There goes nothing? Not so much for me…

It solely hurts to know that all my hard work has gone up in smoke.

I got burned… Really burned.

A loser is how I describe myself at the moment.

Lord knows, how I hate this feeling.

Yes, I know that hate is a strong word. But that’s just how I feel towards all this.

I plainly… hate it.

I’m clearly at the rock bottom of everything now.

Because I have failed… myself.

***

But, I realize that what remains out of me have to rise above these ashes.

It doesn’t matter how much I love it… Maybe I have to make peace and own up to the fact that these kind of job is probably just not meant for me. 

Perhaps…

Meanwhile, now that I got my time to sort everything through. I’m going to take all the time and space I needed to figure out what my next step will be.

All I know for sure is that I refuse to fail again.

As for this, I’m not blaming anyone or anything.

Obviously, I’m trying hard not to beat myself up too hard and regret whatever that has gone past.

‘Cause at this point all l I can say is… Lesson learned.

Lesson well-learned…

…

Life perfect, ain’t perfect if you don’t know what the struggle’s for…

Falling down, ain’t falling down if you don’t cry when you hit the floor…

It’s called the past, ‘cause I’m getting past…

And I ain’t nothing like I was before,

You ought to see me now.

Yes, I was burned…

But I called it a lesson learned.

Mistake overturn, so I called it a lesson learned.

My soul has returned, so I called it a lesson learned.

Another lesson learned…

…

Lesson Learned – Alicia Keys (feat. John Mayer)

New Infatuation.

Okay, so I have to admit that lately I have a new found glory in this one Japanese actor named Mizushima Hiro. I first saw his acting in ‘Hana Kimi’, it’s a Japanese Dorama (naturally…) that was adapted from a manga with the same title ‘Hanazakari no Kimitachi e a.k.a Ikemen Paradise’. I began my journey in watching Asian Drama Series (esp. Japanese Doramas) thanks to the very influence of two of my Cupu friends, Momo and Fira Bebeh. Essentially, they’re both crazy about J-dorama and anything Japanese-y…

All I used to know about Japanese greatness from its entertainment industry was the brilliance that is Monday Michiru. You see, I love this woman… Her music is just plain fantastic for me, above all her lyrics is so eloquent (her English lyrics, mind you. Cuz’ obviously, I don’t understand a word of Japanese).

Anyways, not having any high expectation for this particular J-drama, I started watching it one day amidst my hectic/ever-so-tedious days at the office. To my own surprise, I found myself enjoying ‘Hana Kimi’… a lot! It’s so refreshingly light yet hilariously funny. It somewhat takes me back to my high school days… (Cuz’ I went to an all girl school). Ah, high school days are the best, don’t you think? Everything was so much simpler and full of joy back then…

Back to my main topic of the day, namely Mr. Mizushima… I think that he delivers his role as the womanizing playboy yet extremely-charming and admired senior, Nanba Minami… befittingly. I almost got the feeling that this was just in Mizushima Hiro’s real nature. In ‘Hana Kimi’, this guy totally shines brightly, I believe he successfully overshadow two of the dorama’s leading man, Oguri Shun and Ikuta Toma. Oh, and did I mention the fact that he is a sight for sore eyes? A definite Eye-Candy? Of course, I’m not gonna intentionally forget to mention his darn good looks. Coz’ it’s pretty plain for everyone to see…

So, it was only right that I do a little research on him. Then there I went… Googling about Mizushima Hiro on a whim… Must own up that I like what I read so far about him. The best thing is the fact that he is well educated. Alumni from one of Japan’s Top Private Universities, Keio University, shows that he is not one of those actors that disregard any form of educational experience just because he/she is rising to stardom at the moment.

Then I went on to YouTube, where I found various clips on Mizushima Hiro…

I saw the one where he was in a conversation with this foreign looking kid for his previous movie entitled ‘God Speed Love’… His English is perfect. Restating one of the comment-giver (?) in the site, saying that ‘his English is heka good’… It is, undoubtedly.

I went on thinking that this guy holds the precise formula to fly straight to Hollywood and strive for an acting career there. I hope that he will anytime soon tho… I got a gut feeling that he’ll be a big hit in tinsel town somehow. Following the limelight of (to name a few) Ken Watanabe, Rinko Kikuchi, Masi Oka and Ninomya Kazunari in Clint Eastwood’s ‘Letters From Iwo Jima’. Go Hiro-San Go! You have my unending support… Oh, and I read somewhere that he also writes and makes Hip-Hop music… Geez! If he does so, than this guy is a clear-cut triple threat to all you young Japanese actors out there.

I sincerely hope that his career will continue to grow big, bigger and even to a greater extent than that, if possible. Cuz’ I’m anticipating more of his performance shortly… Soon!

Meanwhile, if you happen to read this, Mizushima Hiro, let me gladly serenade you a brief line from one of NYPC’s song, cuz right now, it’s safe to say that “I’m your F.A.N”.

Last Thursday, on December 6^th 2007, I got to go to what my boss would identify as a ‘Creative Seminar’…

And since I’m working as a so called creative producer in my recent workplace, my superior has decided to sent me and my peer creative producer, Mas Aldy, to this, well… quote-unquote, Creative Seminar.

You see, just before we went there, Mas Aldy and I still got deadlines to meet. So we both pretty much didn’t have the time to browse on this particular event. The event’s speaker profile and itineraries were sent by fax… Doesn’t help at all, cause we can’t see nor read anything for that matter.

Or probably we didn’t really bother that much cause we were so caught up by our deadlines. Ah yes, deadline IS ‘the glory’ of being an instant-selling creative idea of a person, such as myself.

Nevertheless, we both went anyway.

Mainly, because it was also a darn good escape-route… See, we needed to get out of the office for once.

Upon our arrival at the premise, MPX Grande in Pasaraya Blok M, we were… how shall I put this, umm… famished. Starving to death actually, because it was already pass our lunch time. So, we went straight to the buffet and eat for the sake of gratifying our hunger.

When we were done stuffing our stomach, I think that’s when it really hits us that we were so… misplaced. The other attendees that was there were all from the advertising world. Of course we knew no one. Except later on, for my lecturer from college, who by the way was totally unimpressed when he found out that I was working at an event organizer. (Why? What’s with that anyway? O sir, at least, I’m not selling my body on the-recently-damp-night-streets of Jakarta? I’m only… only doing so much as selling my soul, integrity and what I have left as a former idealistic individual to the devil that is, money. What is SO wrong with that? I thought everyone’s doing the same thing?!)

Well, anyways… moving along.

It turns out that the speaker was a female film director that hails from Negri Jiran a.k.a Malaysia, Indonesia’s beloved neighbour … (Btw, what is the latest update on that ‘Rasa Sayange’ song that supposedly was ours but had been claimed first by the Malaysian as theirs? Oh well… let’s just skip that thingy.)

Her name is Yasmin Ahmad. Ms. Ahmad who claims to be half Javanese and half Japanese used to work as a creative director in Advertising Companies in Malaysia, creating TVCs notably for Petronas. But in recent years she has been free-falling to film-making instead of commercial-ad making. With one of the reason, namely that the film world is more appreciative (art-wise), than advertising industry.

So, that day Ms. Ahmad was asked to give us, the attendees, her insights on what creative really is all about. She humbly said that we mere humans are basically not creative… because, only God is the most creative one. And we simply can’t compare to Him.

So, paraphrasing the words of Ms. Ahmad that being creative (for us, humans) is enough just by being a sharp observant of life itself… I believe that I somehow agree with this notion. Don’t you?

Also seeing and hearing her speak that day, was a nice re-revelation (?) for me in claiming back my soul, integrity, and idealistic views that I had lost or deliberately sold along the way. Hehehe… Yeah, I’m claiming it back today!!! … or maybe one of these days… er, expectantly soon-lah.

When I have accumulate enough from the devil (that is money) to claim my so called creative idealism back… J

Meanwhile, I’m just going to observe life to sharpen my creativity more.

Right after I observe the balance on my bank account.

Haha, joking joking!

Ciao, people!